Whether your mum, dad, sister or brother, has a disability, illness or substance dependency, family life can be challenging. So how do you balance your role as a young carer/young adult carer but still have a life of your own? And what support can you get?
Some young people feel that their caring role has brought them closer as a family however, others can feel trapped by their caring role and struggle to see how they will be able to move out, go to university or just have a life of their own. Everyone’s situation is different so it’s important that you have the right balance for you.
School / College
If you feel like you are struggling to keep up with deadlines, your grades aren’t where you want them to be or your attendance is dropping it’s really important to talk to someone and seek help.
So who can you talk to?
Other young carers/young adult carers – lots of young carers and young adult carers have been in a similar position so ask them for advice and tips, if something helped them it could help you too.
YC or YAC Adviser – you can request a 1:1 with your adviser to talk things through, we support lots of young carers and young adult carers to balance their education with their caring role. We can even support you to have a meeting with your school or college to agree a realistic plan.
Student Support – your school or college will have staff who can work with you and your subject teachers to try and find a solution that works for you.
Just remember it’s important to talk to someone when you’re starting to feel overwhelmed by your workload or deadlines, you aren’t the first YC/YAC to feel like this and you won’t be the last!
Home Life
Sometimes there is so much going on at home that it feels impossible to have time for yourself of with friends. YCs & YACs can feel very responsible for holding things together at home, especially if they have younger siblings, its normal to feel this way but it’s important for you to have breaks and create time for yourself.
So what can you do?
Have time out of the house – whether it’s coming along to one of our respite activities or spending time with friends it’s important to remember that there is a big wide world out there and you aren’t alone in your situation.
Talk to someone – friends, family or YC/YAC Adviser. A problem shared really can be a problem halved and other people might be happy to help or might have suggestions or solutions that will help you get a better balance. You don’t have to care in isolation.
It’s okay to say ‘no’ – if you already have plans or just don’t feel like doing something you don’t have to. It can sometimes feel easier to just say ‘yes’ even though it’s not what you want to do. Learning to say no can be challenging when those around you are used to you saying yes, so maybe start by saying ‘I’m not sure, I’ll check/think about it and let you know’.
Lots of YACs are able to move out or move to university and achieve the things they want to in adult life and often they still have a caring role, it just changes a bit as they find a better balance. Sometimes a little bit of help along the way can make everything feel a bit more achievable
