Recently, one of our young carers, Izzy, was invited to speak at a Carers Trust event in the presence of HRH The Princess Royal.
Izzy was asked to share her experiences of being a young carer and the importance of accessing support from services like Suffolk Family Carers and from school. Please read Izzy’s inspiring speech below along with pictures from the event.
Hello, I would like to take the time to thank you for inviting me here today and giving me the opportunity to represent Carers Trust and to speak about the things I’m passionate about.
First of all, here’s a little bit about me…
My name is Izzy and I’m a part of a charity called Suffolk Family Carers. I’d like to share with you my experiences, to try and show what daily life is like as a carer, and hopefully spread some more light on the topic.
I care for my mum, who has EUPD which means everyday tasks that we may find simple, can become emotionally and physically draining for mum.
Rarely do people realise that caring for someone isn’t just about the physical role, but the emotional one as well. Listening to someone’s issues whilst also dealing with your own, putting someone’s feelings above yours, having to deal with the emotional conflict that a role like this can cause for a person who isn’t sure how to process their own problems as well as another’s.
I wake up conscious that Mum may not be in a good place and anything I do could trigger or change this. This might involve Mum getting angry, upset or low in mood very quickly, inevitably this will dictate how I feel on a day to day basis.
During school I try to block out my thoughts and worries. More often than not this will lead to me having low concentration levels in lessons and has at times, negatively affect my behaviour and attitude.
After school is what I see as the hardest part of the day. Mum can fluctuate so I’m never sure if she has managed a food shop, if she has cooked dinner or of the mood she will be in. Consequently, I’m not sure as to what I will need to do when I get home from school. It can range from only doing chores to having to make sure Mum has eaten and sitting with her the entire evening, so she doesn’t feel alone. Or in a worst case scenario; take multiple days off school to care for her when she’s in a depressive state.This has affected me in many different ways, good and bad.
In school I find that there are there are a few main matters that affect me in class. Teachers are not often aware enough to what young carer might have going on. This leads to my teachers not understanding why I can’t hand in that bit of homework, or attend every after school activity. They assume I’m taking advantage of my situation and that I’m looking for an excuse; which simply isn’t the case.
My attendance has also been greatly affected. Along with Mum’s needs and my own, my attendance wasn’t up to standard. As a result my grades had considerably dropped, and I began to struggle to balance my home life with my school one.
Furthermore, I began to look for people who could distract me from my problems. This had lead me into unhealthy friendships with people that negatively affected how I presented myself to others. Believing that I didn’t need help with my caring role influenced by bad behaviour, whereas, compared to now, my grades are consistent as is my behaviour and attendance because of the strong network of support found in family, friends, teachers and Suffolk Family Carers.
Most importantly my experiences have made me a resilient and mature young adult, who is capable of helping others as well as myself. Any carer can find themselves being an empathetic, understanding and considerate person with or without recognition.I have received copious amounts of support in school and at Young Carers. At Young Carers we’re offered monthly clubs- which include fun activities and free food of our choosing. We are also invited to a range of residential trips which act for rest both for us and who we care for. You can also request one to ones with your
support worker, who will come into school on a regular basis to help you with issues or concerns.
Conversely, in school I have a teacher who I can confide in or approach for advice or a break if I find something too overwhelming and need some space to clear my head. My subject teachers have also, more recently, been made aware of what support I need in class and told how and what will help me.
The amount of support I have received is outstanding and not enough people can relate. This is why Carers Trust need to be an instantly recognisable name; every carer deserves to receive the same amount of support that I have had; every carer deserves to be recognised; every carer deserves to feel valued.
